Reflection: Inspired by Cloudy Clouds at outskirts of Palo Alto

It is funny how the more I try to run forward, the more I remember the past!

Today I understood a little bit more about my past. After a year and a half, I have someone put what I could not express in words back then... I probably won't be able to regurgitate it again (I already forgotten half the line already), but it goes something like this:

"... being in the same city for most of their life and then me getting the opportunity to come out here, it makes the other part of you feel left out..."

Now of course life is not so simple that you can summarize a whole sequence of events with one line, but this is probably the biggest catalyst back then -- who knows, perhaps if I had been able to notice this early enough, I could have done something about it...

But don't get me wrong, I am not depressed or anything now. What happened in the past is the price I paid for being ignorant about my own self, and forgetting the very reason I went to Waterloo in the first place.

But then again, perhaps people are right when they say that things happen for a reason; I was looking for a lifetime, but if all it takes is a little doubt to crack, maybe it was not meant to be at all. Or maybe it was just not the right time.

If I could go back in time and redo things over, I would definitely have done more... but times change, and most importantly, people change... what's lost cannot always be found. For all I know, maybe the present has already been replaced by the recent past... but thats all irrelevant to me now, since this stuff I had already known could happen ...

So on top of all the other things I am suppose to be doing, one of my goals is to understand more of others, as well as myself; even though it is a bit late, better late than never right?

And so ends my cryptic spheel on this Palo Alto day where I gone from the sun to the clouds and back...